using our power….

When was the precise moment I realized that being silent, conforming to stupid rules and archaic stereotypes, bugged me? I am not sure. There wasn’t a piercing insight or a sharp inflection point- more of a germinating seed than a tipping point of realization. What I am sure of, though, and maybe this has something to do with it, I realized that western sociocultural norms do not consider older, ageing women as invisible. Yes, as older women, we often feel invisible; however, the reality of the oppressive cultural norm of anti-ageing is oppression through erasure—a societal outcome which negates collectively and individually the ageing woman.

It was a flash of insight, this sensation or feeling of being invisible that so many of us talk about – didn’t make sense. From fiction – think Harry Potter’s Cloak of Invisibility, to Stealth Bombers, that which can’t be seen is powerful! The advantage is wholly in being undetected. That is not what happens as we age; the anti-ageing rhetoric ensures that we aren’t allowed to feel powerful; we are meant to fear the ageing process. To remain visibly youthful, we are told to buy into and adhere to (and consume) the ‘necessary tools’ at an accelerating rate. We are meant to attain the unattainable. AND if we don’t, we are not worthy of consideration – we are erased! Anti-ageing rhetoric believes it holds power over us, but it doesn’t.

It was then, friends, that I realized that my ‘late style’ of living was to no longer fear negation. I will no longer be quiet; I will do what makes me feel strong and know that I can hold onto my power as I age.

Using our power within grants us all passion and the ability to reflect; our life experiences equip us. We know stuff, and we have lived! YES, we are ageing. We all are! To age is to be blessed; we need not apologize or give way to an outside consideration of our value!

Oh yeah, and friends, if that feeling creeps up that someone doesn’t see or dismisses you. Do not worry; it is not because they hold power to oppress and negate. NO, it is because we can choose invisibility. And remember, if, as ageing women, we decide to be undetected, we have the advantage because we are powerful and maybe just maybe we are planning a cultural revolution…